Crabby, crabby, crabby

Moving at the speed of lead, I’m in a race against time to finish all my Christmas gifts. Some of them aren’t going to be done. It’s making me very grouchy.

I thought I’d have Maude Louise completely done and ready to show you today, but there’ve been a few unexpected disasters. I was so proud of myself for finishing the button bands, but it wasn’t totally obvious until I added buttons that they have one or more of the following flaws. Guess which ones are real!

A. The button holes are unevenly spaced.
B. The buttons I bought are too small.
C. The button bands themselves should be wider.
D. Creating the button bands opened a vortex into a dying universe, and now I’m trapped on the other side while a doppelganger tries to adjust to life in our world, and my only hope is to find the mysterious Object of Power and take it to the center of their world in order to return things to the way they should be.

If you guessed A through C, you’re right. If you guessed D, then you have a wonderful and creative imagination that I hope you’re putting to good use. Or you’re crazy. I’ll let you decide on that one.

Gaaaaaah! I have to do the button bands all over! I feel like crying, ala Lucille Ball, thusly, “Waaaaaaaah!” Stoopid, stoopid button bands. I hate you so. Anyway, when I was grumpily ruminating on the unappealing prospect of redoing the button bands, I dozed off, and I had a weird thought that might be a good solution. I can at least try it, since it’s now clear I won’t be able to wear Maude Louise down to Christmas and impress all my relatives. I am going to make the left button band wider than the right and I’m going to either make tiny i-cords or buy some pretty ribbon, and I’m going to make a series of little ties down the front. It might look horrible, but considering that I have to try something new anyway, I might as well try this. I subscribe to the school of failing hugely if I’m going to fail at all.

In other news, I whipped up some very fast fingerless armwarmer thingies with cables. Nothing very impressive, but I think my friend Christine will like them muchly. I will post pictures and a pattern for them soon, because I think they’re a good, inexpensive last minute gift. They look bizarrely like a hip version of the wrist splint I had to use when I sprained my wrist earlier this year.

I’m finishing as much as I can today. I’m finally going to finish the stupid dog coat I’m making for my sister. It’s weird to return to a knitting project I started so long ago, because I can spot all my many mistakes so much better than I could then. Still, it will be done.

I also need to whip something up for my dad. The cushion goes horribly, because while the fabric produced is nice, the two yarns I twisted together are too fluffy and sticky, and they move like molasses through the needles. I may make him an iPod cozy instead.

Gabriel’s intarsia sweater is progressing, but will not be finished. Damn. And I already knew the Seamless Hybrid wasn’t going to make it, but hope is a tease, and I was secretly hoping that maybe, just maybe, it would be a late addition to the heap. Nope.

So, yeah. Crabby.

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